Life of a Werewolf
by kreoff210
Summary: His life might not be the greatest, but Remus Lupin is learning how to live it the best he can. With his friends and secret thoughts that he can't stop from dwelling on. He could have his hands full during his 5th year. [slash]
1. For a second

Chapter One; These characters belong to J. K. Rowling, I am merely having fun with them.

He was washing his hands when the bathroom door opened. He glanced up and saw Sirius staring back at him. "Hey." He greeted, receiving a grunt back. He shrugged away the uncertainty of the hello and continued to clean up. It wasn't like he suspected a warm greeting from the guy. He had known him for five years now, and didn't really know all that much about him. He was James' friend, and like James, knew his secret. But he didn't really know much about him. Only that he was a Black. And Black's were...well...Sirius was...

"Hey Remus." Sirius laughed from the stall. "Are you going to take a bath in the sink?"

At the sound of Sirius' voice Remus realized that his shoes were being soaked along with the front of his shirt. The boy cursed as he quickly turned off the faucet and twisted around for a towel.

Sirius was two steps ahead of him. He held out the fabric for his drenched roommate.

"Thanks." Remus said as he pulled off his shirt and laid it out on the counter to help it dry.

"Welcome..." Sirius answered, staring at his reflection in the mirror. "Remus?" He said after awhile.

"Yes?" Remus answered, wiping his face with the damp cloth.

"I've wanted to tell you something for awhile now." He spat out, his eyes not daring to look at his roommate.

"What's that?" Remus insisted to know.

"I admire you."

"You admire me?"

"Yes." Sirius agreed. "I know what it is like to live in a...well, prison. But I know that I'm able to break away from it. You are your prison." Sirius stared at the faded scars on Remus' face and arms; leaving the other a bit uncomfortable. "And well...I admire that."

Remus couldn't believe his ears. Was Sirius Black really saying these words? He knew the boy was a great trickster, but to play such a trick on him was just...wrong! How dare he even consider the possibility at the attempt? Remus glanced around the restroom to see if James and Peter were hiding behind a stall door.

"And there's something else I've wanted to do for awhile."

"What's that?" Remus asked not paying attention as firm hands grabbed his head just behind his ears. He froze in place when Sirius pressed his lips to his. His heart raced as his mind tried to processes what was happening. He wasn't even in the right state of mind to push away. Shock was all he felt...and...

Remus didn't notice when Sirius stepped away. He only heard the pounding of his heart against his rib cage and a faint humming sound from somewhere in the back of his head. The world was tuned out around him. Not even when the door to the restroom was kicked open, did Remus move out of his state.

"Oi! There you two are! I have been looking everywhere." Rang Peter's familiar squeal to the back of Lupin's head as he stared at the two seeming irritated; although, it was the first place he had chose to look. "You guys have to come in here! James is tossing tracking water balloons out the window at Snivellus! It's great! Come on!"

The three stood in silence for awhile longer, before Black stepped around Lupin, "You coming, Moony?" He asked. The words had no affect on Lupin; he only focused on Black's arm brushing against his as he walked by. "Moony?"

"I'll be right there...I need to...finish up in here." Remus answered in a drone voice, making a slight motion at his shirt.

"Right!" Peter answered and left the restroom, Siruis in tow after a slit pause to stare at the back of his werewolf friend.


	2. Triple the trouble

Chapter two; J. K. Rowlings...still having fun!

Remus' hand shook on its own as he took his wand out of his back pocket, thinking all the time that what had happened was a dream... Or his imagination, but why would he imagine something like that. He didn't think about Sirius in that way. He didn't think about any one in that way. He had never thought any living soul would "admire" him; but Sirius? No way! This was a prank. A horrible trick gone absolutely wrong.

'_Sitis nunc_' Lupin murmured, watching as the water on his shirt evaporated into the air.

"A horrible trick gone wrong." He concluded as he slipped on his shirt and left the restroom to join his friends in the outer room.

Although Remus usually, silently, objected to the torture of the greasy haired Slytherin; Severus Snape. Today he had to admit the stunt James rigged up was hilarious. The messy haired boy had dropped a couple of bewitched muggle water balloons out the dorm window to follow around the Slytherin until it hit its mark; the boy's forehead.

The gang of Marauders laughed continuously as the outline of Severus tried mercilessly to run from the onslaught of muggle merchandise. What made the joke even funnier was after the balloons smashed over the boy's head, they would repair themselves for a second attack!

"Mr. Prongs, I think you might have out done yourself." Sirius grinned with a mad gleam of joy in his eyes.

"Well, Mr. Padfoot. We all must do our part." Laughed James in return.

"That is right." Snapped a stern voice from the boy's dormitory door. Head of Gryffindor house, Professor McGonagoll, glared down at the Marauders with no mercy. "You all will be doing your part to keep this school clean, for your lack of respect for other students and their well being. Ten points from Gryffindor." Peter let out a groan. "Each." McGonagoll added, as she turned on her heel and stormed away from the main reasons her house has not won house cup for five straight years.


	3. Pounce

Chapter Three; still J.K.'s, but having even more fun!

It had been a month since their detentions with Professor McGonagoll started, and now they were coming to their last this coming weekend; which happened to be a full moon, Remus reminded him self. The Professor had deliberately separated the boys into pairs for their weekly cleansing of the school grounds. McGonagoll knew all too well that Potter and Black were, more often than not, the ring leaders. So she paired James with Peter and Sirius with Remus.

During their time together Sirius did nothing but what McGonagoll told him to do. But Lupin was almost certain that he was up to some thing...and he was a little afraid to find out what it would be.

Ever since their encounter in the restroom, Sirius seemed to be avoiding Lupin. Little words were exchanged, few glances were swapped, and even fewer contact. However, it seemed that Remus was the only one who noticed it. Sirius acted like nothing had happened; leaving the wolf twice as confused...

"The two of you will be polishing and dusting off these school trophies during the remainder of your detention." McGonagoll indicated, handing the boys a couple of rags and some metal cleaner that smelt of molding onions to Remus. "I will be in my classroom grading papers. If I hear one word uttered between you two, I will not hesitate to fill your schedules with more time engulfing activies. Do you both understand?"

Black and Lupin nodded their heads in unison, as they watched the Professor disappear through an open door to her left. Remus got to shinning the metal right away. He sprayed the cleaner once and then refussed to use it again. He placed the bottle on the floor next to where he crouched, as he wrinkled his nose.

There was a silent laugh in the throat of Sirius as he dusted the higher trophies, due to the fact that he stood at least a head taller than Remus. The werewolf pushed the thought of Black laughing at him out of his mind. All he wanted to do was finish up with the task at hand, so he could squeeze in some studying before he became distrot and irritble when the first stage of his mental change began.

Why did it have to be him? Why couldn't he had just been left alone? To live a normal life? With normal problems? Instead he was tortured with the beast inside him since he could remember. He didn't blame the man who bite him...how could he? To his knowledge the man, like him, could not controll himself while under the power of the lunar demon in the sky.

Remus tighted his grip on the cloth in his right hand. How he loathed the full moon...and... Lupin stopped thinking. He felt heat raidating off his body when he noticed how close Sirius' leg was to his arm.

Remus' eyes narrowed to focus on the task at hand. Just clean the metal, he told himself. Don't pay any attention to him...or the gape in your brain at the thought of this...

He couldn't see the grin on Sirius' face, but he sensed it there, as the dark haired boy leaned closer to the trophy stand reaching for the spots just out of reach. Lupin nearly collided with his own trophy as Sirius' knees pushed into his back.

"It is late. You boys my leave. Go straight to your common room. No stopping along the way." Order McGonagoll's voice from behind them, saving Remus from any further discomfort.

The werewolf sighed with relief as he get ot his feet. "Thank you, Professor." He smiled, and quickly added. "And 'Night." To ward off the strange look on his teacher's face at the sudden 'thanks' giving to her.

"Good night, Mr. Lupin." She offered, a little confused at why he would be thanking her for being so strain with him. "Straight to your dormitory now."

Sirius lead the way back to the common room. Remus noticed how his shoulder length hair bounced a bit as he seemed to glid down the hall. What was so wrong with this picture? Remus wanted to know. Why would Sirius play such a trick like this on him? Maybe it wasn't a trick... Maybe the boy did "admire" him like he said... Maybe... No! Those kinds of feelings were wrong. What would his mother think? What would Sirius' mother think? Her reaction some how brought a smile to Remus' face. Sirius' mother would be furious with her son if she knew. Maybe that's what Sirius wanted... To tick off his mother that much, he would..then that means it really was all a trick. A joke. Gone horribly wrong, because now Remus was all confused. And a part of him want to grab Sirius' wrist and...

Lupin's eyes were closed when he felt the moist lips to his. He had wanted this, and the action was completed. Remus stumbled back from what he had done, and stared into the shocked face of his room mate.

The two just stared at each other stupidly, until an urge, a desired need forced them back together. Perhaps it was the wolf in him, but Lupin lunged forward, pinning Sirius' back to the corridor's stone wall. His hands tangled themselves into the silk locks and his lips devoured the others as if they were sweet pieces of candy. And then as quickly as it had happened, Lupin fell back his hands covering his mouth in disbelief. What was he doing? Fear mixed with the tears building in his eyes. "I'm sorry." He murmured incoherently and ran, for dear life, to the common room.

"_Gremuerl_." Came out of his lips as he mummbled the password to gain entry through the portait hole.

"Excuse me?" Retroted the fat lady.

"Grindylow!" Remus roared, not slowing from his mad dash.

"Oh." The fat lady sighed, and swung open.

Lupin ran past the blurs of people in the comfy chairs scattered around the common room, and up the stairs to the boy's dorm room. Then, fully clothed, he jumped into his bed and under the covers.

All the while, leaving a Sirius Black pressed to the corridor's wall with a sly, tooth baring grin on his handsome face.


	4. Love to death

Chapter four: J.K.R.; still bring fun to your computer screens! XD

Remus passed out from exhaustion, curled up like a ball undernearth his haven of covers. His unsteady breathes found no escape from the closely knit fabric, causing sweat to trickled down the boy's face in tiny streams where it was then collected like a sponge by his pillow.

The werewolf twisted around under the covers, unconsciously trying to find relief from the heat, when cold fingers found the sweaty flesh of his face. A small smile laced Remus' lips as the fingers tucked his tan bangs behind his left ear and their owner leaned closer to claim the freed spot with its lips. Lupin sighed in relief, pushing away the uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

The tender lips traced Remus' jaw line, as a black shadow swiftly overtook the mysterious owner of the magical touch. The dark mist began to take the form of a ravishing wolf, snarling and deadly. It bellowed its response to this unwelcome pleasure and sank its viciously hungry fangs into the lover's neck.

The blood turning scream that escaped from the innermost reaches of Remus' mind continued to ring through his ears as the pale boy shot to a sitting position on his bed, panting to keep it all together.

Remus lay awake with cold sweat dampening his face. It had been awhile since this type of nightmare had afflicted him. They had stopped around the same time he removed the thought of his father's death from his mind.

What was getting into him these past few days? All this drama was over what? A bloody kiss.

But not any kiss, he told himself, as his deep blue eyes unknowingly drifted over to the lump in the bed to his right; Sirius' bed.

What the bloody hell was going through that boy's mind? Why does he have to torture me so? Do I not have enough trouble as it is? Lupin dropped his gaze in frustration.

Hell.

Silence held the room, even the slight snoring from James was muffled out. Remus pounded his fist onto his bed, before glaring at the alarm clock on his night stand.

5:30

Remus sighed and swung his legs over the side of his bed. There was no use lying around here, and he knew it. He wasn't going to get back to sleep, and he didn't want to. Fully clothed, Remus pulled out a towel from his trunk and left the sleeping area to take a shower.

If anything, he might be able to drown away the numb feeling in his brain and be free of it for good.


	5. Needs

Chapter Five: once again J.K.R's; have fun...aha..warning; you might want a shower cap! XD

The rushing of hot water stung his pale skin. It tore away at the pain dwelling in his mind, by forcing physical agony upon him. Although, just the thought of tonight was causing his bones to ache. He shivered under the stream of burning liquid, as he stared at his hands. Hands that would soon transform into claws, and ripe into his flesh for escape from the creatures who thought they had the right to lock him away. As if, he did not have feelings of his own. As if, he did not need to quench his hunger. The beast grinned in delight. Maybe those fools will come again, It thought. To help him run free. One of these days, he'll get away. He'll show those pathic insects what he is made of, and they will be defenseless against him.

A low growl played in Lupin's throat, unaware of the silent outline on the other side of the shower curtain.

"Moony." Came the half-alseep voice.

The wolf froze, oblivious to the fact that he had stopped breathing.

"Moony, I know it's you. You are the only one I know who patches up their pants." Sirius said in amusement.

Lupin found nothing amusing about that statement, but kept his thoughts to himself.

"Remus? I want you to know," There was a pause, as if Sirius was arguing with him self to pick the right words to say. "I want you to know, that i meant what I said. I do admire you. I want you. I want every part of you. Good. Bad. Mental. Physical. I want it all, and I'm not going to stop until I have you."

Will you still want me when I ripe out your throat? The beast within laughed.

Remus whimpered, running his fingers through his wet hair. How could he think that? It was easy enough, but it still made his stomach turn in disgust. He felt no reason to continue on, and the creeping cold that touched his neck enforced the need he had to pick up the razor he had been eyeing even before Sirius showed up, until he realized what caused the chill.

Sirius' hand was floating inches away, as if offering him freedom. Freedom from his pain. His corrupt thoughts. His desire to flee from his problems in shame. All he had to do was reach out to it. To claim what he deserved; happiness. Love. And at this moment, no other feared thought strayed into his mind.

Remus tangled his fingers around Sirius', and felt the piece of him that was missing all those years press up against him. Sharing with him the racing pulse that was meant to be one.


	6. No regrets

Chapter Six

It might have been the heat caused by the body against him or the need to just melt away from the physical world while pinned underneath those delicious lips attached to his that Remus didn't notice the rushing waterfall above his head turned ice cold, until the words were spoken into his sensitive ears. "The air has chilled, maybe we should go some place warmer?" The foreign voice suggested, twisting the faucet off.

"I'm not cold." The wolf shivered.

"Your blue lips say other wise, come on." Hands still held tightly together, Sirius lead his prized wolf out into the sunlight pouring into the restroom. He grabbed Remus' towel off the floor and without a warning began to dry the boy.

No protest came to prevent the action, and that brought a smile to Sirius' face and a slight shade of pink to Remus', mixing with the blue to reveal a pale purple color making it seem as if some one had punched him. And Remus felt just like some one had. The air was knocked out of him. He gasped for oxygen; feeling as if he was failing to keep his head above the endless sea in the depths of his mind. The last thing Remus remembered was waken from a nightmare...maybe this was still the dream? There was one way to figure it out.

"Ow. Why'd you pinch me?" Sirius' barked, tossing the damp towel onto the floor.

"Dream." Came the sleepy response.

"You're suppose to pinch yourself." The dark haired boy pointed out.

"Ow. Why'd you pinch me?" Lupin asked, in disbelief, rubbing his left arm.

Sirius laughed and ushered the wolf out of the restroom, and back into bed. "You should get some more sleep. You're going to need it."

"I'm not tired." Remus assured him, climbing under the covers and placing his head onto his pillow.

"Bullocks." Black concluded, sliding in next to him.

"Wha're you doing..." Remus asked half-heartedly, as skilled hands began to rub the back of his skull and neck.

"Sh, just rest." Were the last words Lupin heard before difting off into a dreamless sleep.

space

Remus' conscience told him he needed to be alone. It voiced itself with every quick, short breathe he took as he waited for the moon to flash her traitorous face through the cracks of the boarded up windows.

"It's going to be fine, Moony." James' voice lied with a smile.

Remus gave him a tempted half-smile as he pulled his knees to his chest. '_It's going to be fine._' Mocked the beast ready to rip its way out of the trembling weakling it was caged in. '_I'll take good care of them._' Remus whimpered and buried his face into the side of his leg; eyes shut tightly.

Grey eyes glared from their corner. They couldn't take this torture any longer. Determined to lighten the mood, Sirius strolled up to his friend. He pressed his lips close to his werewolf's left ear. "It will be fine, Remus. Just think, maybe you'll get Wormtail this time?"

"Hey!" Squealed the rat from his stand by the window. Remus laughed despite his current condition as the story, his fellow Marauders so heartily told him, about their first transformation together came flooding into his mind. Sirus' barked laugher filled the air as he rolled around on the common room floor, warming Remus' insides, while James recalled how Moony had chased their friend rat around the dusty room for a good half hour trying to eat him.

"Thanks." Remus smiled at his friend, before a tremor of pain ran through his small frame and he blacked out to the world.

space

The next time he woke, Remus was tucked nicely into a bed in the hospital wing. He had concluded he hated the place after his millionth visit during his third year. The place brought out a dark feeling of being trapped, like the Shrieking Shack had after his first year. They left him alone. Abandoned him. He might as well have been chained to dungeon wall! He thought bitterly.

"Awake are we?" A solid yet whimsical voice asked from the shadows at the end of Remus' bed.

"Yes, sir." The boy answered, knowing the owner at once. "Thank you, Headmaster."


	7. Love and lose

Chapter Seven

"No need to thank the vile being responsible for caging you all these years."

Remus flinched, dropping his eyes to the sheets stretched across his chest. He must not have hidden his thoughts as well as he should have, and now the Headmaster thinks he's an ungrateful beast.

What better way to show how much he appreciates Ablus Dumbledore's generosity by giving him dirty looks? Remus thought bitterly, as a hand connected with his shoulder. Remus let out a small yelp, both from surprise and the pain that coursed through his arm.

"I do not begin to comprehend the inner weavings of the wolf within you, but I assure, you should not dwell on his desires for they will not get you far in life." Dumbledore smiled, squeezing Remus' shoulder just so.

'_Rip off Its arm!_'

"Yes, sir." Remus answered, inching away as best he could while tucked under the haven of sheets, not sure if it was him or the wolf that gave the command.

The eerie silence between teacher and student increased. Leaving Remus to squirm uncomfortably and stare longingly at the closed hostipal door with multi-colored eyes. He felt like running from the scene, until he heard Dumbledore speak again. "I see your transformations are becoming less threating."

"Yes, sir. I must be gaining more control over my mind, now that I'm older." Remus lied between his teeth.

"Yes. Perhaps the wolf's mind is focused on other matters." Lupin's eyes grew wide with a hint of fear, as the Headmaster paused. "Is there something you wish to tell me, Remus?"

Remus held his breath. "No, sir. Nothing."

Dumbledore tilted his head foreward to stare over his half-moon spectacles, "If there is nothing. I will let you rest."

"Sir?" Remus blurred out, as the Headmaster turned to walk away.

"Yes, Mr. Lupin?"

"Could I...could I ask you a question, sir?"

"Of course." Was the simple response.

"What-" Remus paused, the words he wanted to say lingered just out of his reach. "What...what are your views on...on...love?" There. He said it. There was no going back from this point on, but it still didn't stop his hands from shaking against his legs. He didn't dare look at the Headmaster, and he couldn't reason why.

Ablus Dumbledore cleared his throat, he had not been expecting that, but without blinking an eye he stated; "It's essential to life."

"I was afraid of that." Remus mumbled to himself. "Have you ever been in love, sir?" He asked aloud.

"Of course, Remus. I am no stranger-"

"Wait." Remus interrupted the Headmaster, needing to say what was on his mind before he exploded. "Let me reverse the question." Dunbledore nodded his head. "Have you ever- Have you ever been in love with some one, you know you could never possible have? Because of circumstances that were out of your hands. Because of judgmental eyes that will bear down on you where ever you may go with that one person; shunning you with every glare. And because you yourself were scared beyond reason, that you might fail in living up to the others standards. Afraid you might hurt them and then they would never look at you the same. They would in turn glare at you with the same judgmental eyes that shunned you before."

The Headmaster sighed inwardly as the whole question, despreate voice and all, poured from the young man's mouth. His face held solid like stone, as he flicked his wand hand and sat down just as a chair appeared underneath him. "Lyanna Crest. She was the daughter of a wealthy French muggle. She was his prize. The heir to his estate; his legacy, and his right to offer her into the hands of the man he saw fit to claim all he possessed.

"She had breathtaking eyes. A shimmering golden yellow, with traces of sunshine orange." He paused, taking in the mental image. "It was those eyes that lead me to her.

"It was another harsh winder day, and I found myself trudging through waist deep snow with a fierce wind wipping snowflakes into my eyes. I needed to get of the snow, I was starting to feel the frostbite working at my ankes. The wind flickered to a stop just so I could make out an overhang that belonged to a hotel an arms length away.

"Without a second thought I marched to my decided destination blind as a bat. The moment I felt the wind subside from its onslaught, I realized my eyes were closed. When they opened, my hands started to shake. Not from the cold, no. The moment I caught sight of Lyanna's eyes, they had melted away any trace of the blizzard, shinning brighter than the sun itself.

"It was her, and I knew I had to know more about her. Every little detail. I went about doing just that. I met her countless times after our first encounter. Then her father found her sneaking around and put a stop to our lust. She was to be married. To a man she had never met, and felt no love for.

"Her father imprinted into her mind that she will learn to love him. And as she recited the recording to me, my heart sank. But I could do nothing to prevent the joining.

"She went on and married the other man. She gave brith to three sons and a daughter."

"Are you still in contact with her, sir?" Remus asked eagerly.

"I am afraid to report she had passed giving brith to her last son, at the young age of thrity-four."

"Oh. I'm sorry, sir."

The Headmaster inhaled before getting to his feet. "I know my story did not exactly answer your question, Remus, but I hope it has shown some light on the path you are searching for?"

"It has, sir. Thank you."

"Good." Dumbledore smiled, his eyes twinkling in the dim candle light. "I have talked your ear off long enough, Remus. Get some sleep."

"Yes, sir. Good night." Remus beamed, watching until the Headmaster vanished through the large oak doors, before turning on his side and slipping off into sleep. Thoughts of love and snowflakes drifting through his mind.


	8. Hit full force

Chapter Eight

He glared around the dust and blood stained room with his gray and white vision. It felt like a slow motion, old fashion movie as his eyes surveyed his surroundings of broken furniture piled into shredded wooden splinters and fabric. The edges of his sight were blurred with different colors, but possessed a red tint that indicated his need to quench his parched throat.

He had a mission. To search out the scent of the creature who fed him with half truths and horrible lies.

And he knew they were just that, for he was the lord of false faces and pointed tongues. He would not allow that beast to claim his weaker half. Not if he had any say in the matter.

He snarled with joy as he caught a glimpse of the black fur and struck. Hollow yellow eyes lit with greedy pleasure at the sensation of flesh and blood slipping past his taste buds and down his throat. His keen ears relished in the sweet song of pain as it erupted from his victim.

OoOo

Remus' screams echoed off the hospital wing's stone walls as the screams in his ears rang on.

Madam Pomfrey was to his side instantly, but it was not her arms that wrapped around his head protectively. Patting his sandy hair, and whispering lightly into his ear that it was all a bad dream; continuing even after sleep washed over him.

OoOo

It had been an hour since Madam Pomfrey excused Remus from her charge, but not before sentencing him to his own bed and making him promise to eat three plates full of food come dinner time. And she made it quite clear to him that she would be watching to make sure he completed his vow.

Remus could do nothing more than smile at her concern and nod like the best of them, even though he would have done anything to ignore her and run like a madden dog to his remaining class of Defense Against the Dark Arts. It was just his luck that he had an over protective nurse and the after affects of the cursed moon to stop his desires once more.

Instead, Remus sat on his four-post absentmindedly patting his companion; a one Mrs. Norris. She purred contently as Remus scratched her neck. He had no clue how she always managed to find her way into the boy's dormitory, but he was grateful she could and did. As much as he would deny it to any one who asked, he was plagued with nightmares. Ones he would not even wish upon his enemies, had he truly had any. He guessed the feline sensed that about him, for on his first night between those silk covers on that enormously over sized bed he felt the wisp of fur against the side of his face and the soft cry of Mrs. Norris in his right ear.

Remus knew that if Sirius caught her in the dorm again he was going to murder him. Mrs. Norris was Filch's 'partner in crime' and, as Sirius puts it, Remus was fraternizing with the enemy! But he could care less, and he did as he ran his finger tips through the cat's thick fur.

"What is _that_ doing here!" Barked an all too familiar voice from the doorway. "I thought I made my views clear on how I loath that _creature_ and how I forbid it to set tail or paw into this room again, Mr. Moony." Sirius stated matter-of-factly.

"I'm terribly sorry, Mr. Padfoot, but as much as I would love to have control over any thing, my self included, I must say I fail miserably in that department." Remus laughed, as Mrs. Norris hissed at the sight of the raven haired fifth year.

Sirius growled back, and then snickered as he succeeded in driving the feline off the bed. She gave the boy one last death glare, had she been human, and ran underneath Peter's bed not to be seen again.

"Was it just me, or did you see the love in the air?" Remus chuckled, finally turning his attention to Sirius. "Where's James and Peter?" He asked, finding the other alone.

"They went to see if you were still in the hospital wing. I would have gone with them, but I had a feeling you weren't there. And I was right!"

"That's nice to know." Remus smiled, as Sirius threw his bag onto his bed and promptly shed his school robe, tossing it next to the bag. "You missed a rather interesting Defense lesson." He teased.

"Oh, really?" Remus lifted an eyebrow. "It must have been good, seeing as _you_ thought it was interesting. Do continue, Mr. Padfoot."

"Well, we reviewed the finer points of seeking out the werewolf among us, Mr. Moony. Could you possibly have any idea how that is done? Or do think you might need tutoring on the subject?"

Remus gulped silently as Sirius slid onto the bed as if his body was made of liquid, his gray eyes gleaming with a hint of mischief and hidden desires as they lazily caught Remus'. "Well, I am a bit dense when it comes to the subject. What are these things you call _werewolves_ again?"

Using that liquid form, Sirius flowed along the sheets, a grin frozen in place. "Well..." He had every intention on damming up the space between the two canines, but halted mid way as a dark pair of blue eyes flickered with golden brown narrowed at his approach.

"What's that?"

Confusion grabbed Sirius. "What's what?"

"What happened to your shoulder?"

Sirius held his breath, realizing the black and blue mark shone brighter than the sun while hidden under his white T-shirt. His gray eyes quickly hid a hint of distaste as he had obviously been planning to hide the wound from Remus at all cost. "It's nothing big. Just a stupid prank gone wrong with Snivellus, that's all." He smiled convincingly, but his eyes cursed his brain's lasps of memory the moment his lips stopped moving.

"Since when did Snivellus grow razor sharp fangs, and would willingly embed them in your flesh?" Was the drone response.

Sirius winced. "Since he starting fancying me in second year." He forced a bark laugh, knowing Remus wasn't buying it.

"It was me. I did that." He didn't ask, and he refused to alter his hurt, pleading eyes.

"It was my own fault." Sirius answered. "I shouldn't have moved that quickly."

"You couldn't have moved any quicker, had you been warned."

"Oh, Remus." Sirius begged. "Stop. It was my own fault. Believe me. I- Please don't look that way."

Remus pushed all the feeling he had left out of his face, but it still deepen his eyes with its presence. "Does it hurt?" The tired boy asked after awhile.

"No. Not at al-" Sirius choked on the last word as Remus grabbed his right shoulder, and pressed his palm into it.

"Liar." He stated simply, as the door to the dorm room opened with a loud crack of wood against stone and James' cheerful voice announced their entering, if the door had not.

"All right you two! We're coming in, whether you are decent or not!"


	9. Hide your pride

been awhile since I wrote this, but they still aren't mine. :O)

Chapter Nine

"That's just wrong." Peter pulled a face as he flung his bag onto his own bed, the mirror image of James. "Why, in Merlin's name, would _they_ be in the nude!?"

"Joke, Mr. Wormtail." James rolled his eyes, indicating to Peter to leave the thinking to the more gifted.

"And a funny one it was, Mr. Prongs." Remus chuckled from the bed, all emotion from before gone without a trace. "If you had not come to my rescue; I would have been flat on my back, a rather frisky Padfoot nipping at my skin. How were classes?" Although he continued the joke, he had every intention on changing the subject.

"Aha, the usual. Potions, Care of Magical Creatures, and, of course, Defense! Great lesson that was!" James nudged Peter in the ribs with his elbow, a grin playing on his lips. "Potions class was beyond boring today. Until a pink bar of soap decided to help Snivellus with his potion making!" James failed to suppress a snort of laughter as Peter fell of his bed. "Isn't that right, Sirius?"

A muffled chuckle and, what sounded along the lines of, a 'hell yeah' reached their ears as Sirius dug around in his trunk. Remus took notice, as James continued his tale, that Sirius could use that skilled liquid form of his for retreating, just as well as advancing. And that feat not only amazed Remus, but scared him. What had he allowed himself to believe? What came to possess him that he thought he could have Sirius? Not just as a friend. That he could even consider that he would be an equal to a Black. Yes. He was a Black. Remus had read enough books to realize what a Black could and have come to be, but not Sirius. Wasn't Sirius better than that? He could see Sirius step one toe into the cold, dark waters of the Black family and shiver away with...not fear, but bravery to say no. Courage to walk away; an ability Remus knew he did not retain. He closed his eyes a brief moment, the feel of burning water spread across his skin; Sirius completed him. He...

"Remus?" James placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Hmm?" He blinked a few times.

"Ready for dinner?"

Remus' smile brightened his face. "I thought you'd never ask."

OoOo

Stuffing his face with food was not only easy, but looked forward to. He could gorge away his problems for at least the time being. It stopped him from talking, even thinking, and allowed him to bask in the company of great friends. Oh, he would never trade these occasions for anything!

Remus' mouth was full of mashed potatoes when Lily Evans strolled up behind him, placing her right hand gently on his shoulder. "Remus, I didn't see you in Potions. Did you still want to get together for our study group? Or are you feeling ill?"

Remus swallowed slowly, as he stared into the concerned green eyes shining down on him. "Of course." He smirked. "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"Are you sure?" She insisted, removing her hand from his shoulder and placing her cold fingers on his forehead. "You seem really pale."

"I'm fine. Eight thirty in the library. I'll be there." To ensure he was really okay, he smiled at her. The candle light mixing with the setting sun from the enchanted ceiling caused his hazel blue eyes to sparkle.

"All right." She smiled in return, "See you then." and then left to join her friends at the other end of the table.

When Remus turned his attention back to the other Marauders; what a scene waited for him. James had a waterfall of pumpkin juice gushing from his mouth and down the front of his shirt. Peter's mouth gaped open not only from shock at the display between Lupin and Evans, but from the fact that his hero, his god, his lord almighty, James Potter was allowing Remus to make a fool of him. And as his beady little eyes darted from one figure to the next, you could tell he was thinking murder in the first degree.

Sirius' expression was the one Remus took most notice to. His black eyes held a deep darkness, as he glared after the Evans girl. The fork grasped in his closed fist bent at three different places, but still clung to the food that was about to be processed into energy by the person who was steaming away all his supply at the present time.

"Guys?" The question was lost as both James and Sirius snapped out of their haze and demanded.

"What the _Hell_ was that about?!"

"Evans is helping me with my Potions work. She has been since second year. You guys know this." Remus reminded the boys.

"Bloody red head." Sirius grumbled as he slammed his fork to the table.

"Bloody Remus." James mumbled as the glass in his hands dropped to the table with a clink; the front of his shirt forgotten, if it was even noticed.

"Don't you dare say anything bad 'bout Remus, Potter." Sirius growled.

"Don't you dare say anything bad 'bout Lily, Black." James growled back.

"Prongs. Padfoot. Calm down." Moony instructed, trying to bring peace back. He eyed Peter; sweating profoundly. "Stop before Peter here wets his pants."

That worked. Both Marauders shot their death glares at the poor, innocent target, and started laughing out loud.

Remus knew that his comment wasn't all that funny to lead to Sirius falling to the floor in fits of laughter. Something had happened to Peter. With that in mind, Remus leaned over the table's surface for a better view and, sure enough, Peter had soiled himself.

The Marauder's face became as red as Evans hair within seconds of being caught. His breathing increased, and it took every ounce of control on Remus' part not to bust out laughing with the rest of the group.

Instead he caught Peter's terrified eyes with his own and ordered the boy to run. "Run, Peter! Run!"

Peter didn't have to be told twice. Scurrying out of his seat, he bolted out of the Great Hall.

As soon as Peter's retreat was over Remus couldn't hold in the laughter one second more, and companied Sirius on the floor at his feet.


	10. Close

Chapter Ten

It was rounding eight fifteen when the remaining Marauders decided their porky friend was not coming back, and, to try to mend his bruised pride, they started stuffing their pockets with whatever desserts they could load their robes with.

"Think he would like this?" James asked, holding up a caramel apple.

"I guess," Sirius shrugged, staring at the treat with great interest. "but I think it might have been left over since Halloween... Aha, bring it anyways, Pete will eat anything." Sirius grinned, as his sight shifted onto Remus who was about to stuff his face with his third chocolate bar. "Great idea, Moony. Wormtail will love chocolate!" Sirius laughed as he snatched the bar away, leaving Remus to gnaw on his hand.

"Ow! Yah, Prat!" Remus scowled, nursing his hand. "I was eating that!"

"Don't you think you mutilate yourself enough, Moony? There's no need to continue in human form." Padfoot laughed.

"Shh...Keep your voice down." Remus hissed.

"You're telling Sirius Black to keep quiet? That's like pleading to a werewolf not to murder your family on a full moon." A drone voice snickered from behind James' head of messy hair.

Heads snapped to attention at the unwelcome guest. Sirius sneered when he caught the hint of fear Snape caused in Lupin's large eyes. "Or trying to stop a certain Slytherin to cease being a greasy haired git!" Barked Padfoot at the mere thought of the unknown insult directed toward his Remus.

"Yeah." Agreed James as he rose out of his seat; glaring into the black pupils that reflected back as much hate and loathing in return.

"Slither away, Snivilley. Before I make you regret the day you were born, because I sure do."

Remus did not like where this was going. Neither boy had drawn their wand, but it was only a matter of seconds. "He's not worth it," Remus could just make out the words his mouth was forcing into a sentence. "Not with the Professors right there." Still no movement. "Leave, Snape. Or I'll take away points."

"For being a senseless, nitwit." Black sneered.

"For loitering where you shouldn't be." Lupin threatened, ignoring Sirius' comment, pieces of the wolf in his eyes.

"Like it will help." Snickered Severus. "Besides, I only came over to wish Gryffindor luck against Ravenclaw. Because we Slytherins are looking forward to wiping the Quidditch pitch with you and claiming the cup, once again." And before a single word could be uttered in response, Snape turned on his heels and exited the great hall.

OoOoOo

It took two minutes to snap out of the daze Severus Snape left Remus in. Three more to excuse himself from the dinner table, which consisted of a couple of 'fucks and shits' as he stared down at his watch. One second to glare at Black and Potter, silently telling them to lay off the stupid git. And the rest of the time he had to dash up to the Gryffindor tower, grab his book bag (right school books included), and then make his way to the library with three seconds to spare; making the flushed cheeks and desperate need for a drink of water worth the record he just beat in his mind. Remus had a breathless smile pasted to his face as he plopped down in one of the, surprisingly comfy, wooden chairs next to Lily Evans. "Made it." He chimed.

"Did you run here?" Evans laughed, lifting her eyes off the book she was reading.

"Only the last stretch. Felt like a marathon...but without the people holding out cups of water on the sidelines." Remus exhaled, taking out his Potions text. "Which would have been nice, if you ask me."  
Lily shook her head in an 'I can't believe you' sort of way, and conjured a glass of water; ice water! "Here." She smiled, pushing the glass closer to him.

"Thank you, M'Lady." The words were soaked in thanks, praise at her skill, and deep gratitude as the cold water rushed past his tonsils, quenching each and every part of his body with instant relief. "That was excellent."

"Good. Ready to begin? We have been going over the Draught of Peace for awhile now, and have moved onto the reverse potion needed to wake the person under the sleep. Page one sixty is where we should begin."

And it went on from there. Going over one potion ingredient after the next. Slughorn had assigned a twelve inch long parchment on all three main ingredients of the potion, playing off mostly on where and when to find them. Remus found that part of the work simple, it was when he had to put the knowledge to the test and create the master piece that everything fell apart. They both decided to work on that part tomorrow in the common room because it was nearing ten o'clock and although Madam Pince knew Remus had to catch up on his school work, she also wanted to lock up the library and sleep away the rest of the night in peace; her dreams full of childrenless spaces.

Both Prefects packed up their belongings, waved Madam Pince good night, and headed back to Gryffindor tower. They turned one corner when Remus got the sudden craving for chocolate. Hot chocolate. "Hey, Lily?" He placed his fingers lightly on her elbow, asking her to stop a moment. She complied and stared at him with questioning eyes. "Have you ever been to the kitchens?

Lily shook her head. "Why?"

"I have a craving for hot chocolate." He confessed. "Would you like to accompany me to the kitchen to smother the need? I know a way that few people are acquainted with..."

Lily's face dropped in shock. "Remus! Just because you're a Prefect doesn't mean it gives you the right to stretch the rules to your benefit." She scolded, with a hint of mischief in her glowing eyes.

He gave her a half-smile and offered his left arm to her. "Is that a yes?"

Lily laughed in turn and linked her arm to his. "Lead the way."


	11. Like spilled milk

Chapter Eleven

Remus led Lily down a path she did not know, and it played so plainly on her shocked and excited face. He took her to the right, then another right, down a dark hall; which surprised her even more when Remus guided her down it without a single ounce of light from wand or window. He proceeded to go down a flight of stairs that she would have fallen down if he had not warned her seconds before they came to them. "Stairs…Watch your step." He smiled, as she grabbed his arm tighter, stopping before she broke her neck.

They descended the steps just before they disappeared from sight. "They do that sometimes." Remus laughed and continued to follow the torches along the walls.

How did they get to the dungeons? The question traced Lily's face as they came upon a large painting of a fruit bowl. In utter amusement, Remus lifted his right hand to the lone pear and tickled the fruit. Lily couldn't help to giggle along with the squealing food item, until it turned into a door knob.

Remus grinned and pulled open the door. "After you."

OoOoOo

_Wow,_ Lily exclaimed. To think she would have gone her whole time at Hogwarts not seeing beyond the enchanted ceiling, moving pictures, or changing corridors. The room was as large as, if not larger, than the Great Hall. Shining brass pots and pans lined the stone walls, while four long tables and one adjacent littered the floor. The great brick fireplace at the end of her sight was what caught her breath.

The master piece hung high over the other items as a King's castle did over its land. A fire blazed in the hearth, illuminating Lily's emerald eyes even at the entrance to the room. Remus could not help having that goofy smile cross his lips; the look in his friend's eyes was priceless. He swallowed the lump in his throat to comment on the subject as a small figure appeared at their feet.

"Master Lupin." The house-elf squealed, beaming its sparkling purple eyes in his direction. "Would Master Lupin like his usual snack?"

Remus chuckled nervously, side glancing at Lily who seemed beyond amused. "Not tonight, Breeze. Just some hot chocolate...and maybe those cream puffs we had for dinner tonight, if there are any left. Unless you want tea, or something else, Lily?" The red head blushed, mumbling that hot chocolate was fine.

"Of course!" Squealed Breeze, and vanished before their eyes.

"Come here often, Master Lupin?" Lily teased.

"I don't encourage it." Remus protested, scratching the back of his neck. "Come on, the seats by the fire are better on the back."

"Lead the way, Grandpa." Lily giggled, following suit. Remus grumbled about gray hairs and darn kids ruining his lawn, as Breeze and a hand full of other house-elves appeared with drinks and dessert.

"Master Lupin, sir! Breeze has found cherry chocolates, sir. Ones sirs like, sir." Breeze happily beamed, as the tray was placed on the table between the friends.

Remus swallows the saliva pooling in his mouth. "Thank you, Breeze." He manages, as the house-elf disappears.

"You do know you have a serious problem?" Lily giggled, watching the misty look Remus' face held as the dark covered cherry melted out of existence.

"Mmm..." Was the only sound that escaped, as the victor savored the spoil.

Green orbs sparkled with amusement, then seconds later were hard like stone. "Remus? I want to ask...well, inform you about a problem that has been bothering me for some time now."

Holding his breath, Remus thought that phrasing sounded all too familiar. There is no way his life could be taking so many turns at once. What does fate take me for? A yo-yo? Bloody hell, the boy thought as warm fingers gently graced over his. Remus jerked his hand back so quickly the small tin of milk spilled its contents over the metal tray. "I'm sorry." A bit too nervous, as he cleaned the mess with a napkin.

"No, I'm sorry." Lily corrected, scooping his busied hands into hers. "I should have told you sooner. But I figured you would tell me when you were ready."

"W-what?" The boy stuttered. "What are you going on about, Lily?"

The tips of her red locks dragged along the table's surface as she leaned forward on her chair, her grip tightening on the others. "I know you're a werewolf, Remus."

_So the Flower figured it out? What to do now, whelp? Think we should give her a reward?_ The wolf laughed, and Remus mirrored it. The chuckle had a hint of hysteria to it, which soon turned to a collection of dry eye sobs.

"Remus. Remus, it's all right. I've known since third year, but I haven't told any one. Or plan to tell any one." She patted his hand softly. "Please trust me."

"I do, Lily." Remus confided. With all my heart, his mind added. "Maybe we should finish our cocoa? I'm not sure about you, but I find the drink not as appetizing cold." The redhead nodded in agreement, and sipped at her hot chocolate. Silence fell between the two friends as the minutes ticked by. There were many thoughts buzzing through Remus' mind, but he could not grab hold of them to form a coherent sentence. He trusted Lily, without a doubt. And he knew she was the same way toward him. He also knew it was a matter of time that she would work out his...problem. "So, third year?" He ventured. "James and the others have one up on you, seeing they cornered me about it in second year. They said that, 'they didn't care'. How about you?" He reached for another cherry treat. "What's your view?"

Lily grinned, as if that answered any and all his questions.

"I know what you are thinking." He partly accused.

"And what might that be, smarty?"

"You only sport that grin when you believe I turned a simple conversation into a business meeting. Or James is acting like a brat."

"Well, since James always acts like a brat, because he is one, I'm going to go with the first. Must you always be so formal?"

"Yes, actually." Remus stared into his empty mug.

Lily sighed. "I accepted it."

"Excuse me?"

"I accepted your condition." She repeated, rising one eyebrow over the rim of her own mug. "Haven't you?"

The pale boy swallowed away the lump in his throat caused by those words. She accepted...my condition? "I'm not sure." He admitted, stuffing another chocolate in his mouth. "I just remember being told that this was what I am. And there was nothing to cure it. My parents tried, best they could, but there is only so much you can do with a helpless goal in mind."

"Is it really that hopeless?"

"Please, Lily."

"I think you should stop eating those." She commented, catching his plea to change the subject. "You're going to eat yourself into a chocolate coma."

"Well, I wouldn't be stuffing my face so much with them, if you would eat one or two."

"What! And have them go straight to my thighs? I don't think so."

Remus rolled his eyes. "I highly doubt that will happen. Your metabolism is too high, but it won't be for long. So enjoy the freedom when you can still move with grace." The boy concluded, failing to suppress a snicker, and receiving a cherry treat to the forehead. "Oi! Poor little guy." He gasped, picking the damaged treat from the stone floor. "It's okay, I'll nurse you back to health."

Lily exploded with laughter as Remus cradled the cherry in the palm of his hand. The chocolate was slowly melting to his finger tips, and before long the treat had disappeared altogether. "Some Healer you are."

"I'm sorry, Madam. We tried all we could. He was just beyond saving." Remus said, after he cleared his throat. "Is that really the time?" Remus stared at his wrist watch.

"Yep, quarter to eleven."

"I think we should head back now." Remus suggested, pushing to his feet.

"Do you have to be somewhere?" Lily asked, reflecting his moves.

"I kind of said I would help Sirius with his Charms essay. Although, he does not need the assistance. I'm just an excuse to get him distracted, so tomorrow I'll feel guilty, and let him copy mine. I'm disappointed to report; I fall for it every time." Lily shook her head as they both left the kitchen, waving good night to Breeze and the rest of the elves.

oOoOoOo

They got back the Common Room with no one in sight to stop them, thanks to Remus. The two stopped at the foot of the stairs leading off to the girl and boy dormitories.

"Good night, Remus. Thanks for the hot chocolate." The redhead smiled.

"Good night, Lily. You're welcome." The werewolf offered back. "Sweet dreams." They both locked eyes, as if sealing the trust between them, before disappearing to their own rooms.

Remus crept as quietly as possible into the dorm room. He figured the rest of the Marauders would be sleeping due to the fact that they had Divination at eight tomorrow. And as he began the process for bed, Remus rejoiced that he dropped that class. He loved to learn new things, but he was still choking on that stifling warm and sickly perfumed air. The wolf couldn't think straight in that tower at two in the afternoon, his mind expanded at the thought of eight in the morning. He shivered slightly at the idea and began to stuff his bag with the books he'd need tomorrow; lucky for him his first class was at ten and Runes was a much better subject hands down.

The boy was pulling the covers loose on his bed when he heard the clearing of a throat behind him. "And where have you been?" It inquired.

Remus turned slowly, "I was in the kitchens with Lily Evans." He answered.

Grey eyes flashed in the dark. "Why were you there with her?"

Remus grinned, he couldn't help himself, as he sat on the edge of Sirius' four-post. "Duh, isn't it obvious? We were on a date." Sirius' left eye twitched a little, as Remus burst out in silent laughs so he wouldn't wake the others. "You are so gullible." The other opened his mouth then closed it. He looks so adorable, Remus thought. He wanted to run his hand through his hair, to see if it was still as silk smooth as before. He reached forward, stopped, held his breath, and then drove his finger tips through the glorious black mane.

His breathing gradually returned as the moment relaxed in his mind, and he realized it could be better. Body and mind lost control over the other and Remus found himself leaning forward and claiming Sirius' lips with his own. Oh, his mind shuttered, this is bliss. His thoughts began to gather as he floated away, back to his own mattress. "Good night, Padfoot." Remus smiled in the dark, slipping into the sheets and then flipped onto his stomach.

There was silence, then a small voice replied with. "Good night, Moony."


	12. Let loose

_Disclaimer: All characters belong to the charming, thrilling, (lets face it) got to them first J. K. Rowlings. They are just at my mercy now! XD_

Chapter Twelve

He was one with the structure; blending in the shadows of the darken cage that haunted him til this day. He mesmerized each of those squeaking steps, and heard them creek in protest even before the silent feet padded down them.

The man held the trembling boy to his chest; his heart beat soothing away some of the tention and fear of another evening of terror that will only show itself in the depths of the tiny child's mind.

If only the weather beaten man knew how much the shadow wanted to wrap his arms around the other's neck and never let go. How much it pained that misty being to watch helplessly as the man lowered the small creature from his warm embrace down onto the cold, unwelcoming stone floor. The wind whimpered along with the half-child as his hero, his reason for life, left one last kiss on his forehead and turned to leave; the words, _I love you, son_, nestling in his keen ears.

The mist settled his deep eyes onto the half-child again. He felt every tremor. He took in every short breath. He waited with such angst, it burned at the back of his throat; until it tore from the half-being's chords. The scream filled the moon lit cellar with its song. The iron bars that stood their ground between the beast and the free world, shivered with the hidden sympathy of its lunar mother. The thought caused the shadow's lips to twist into a snarl; taking on each characteristic the half-child will learn the meaning to in time. And loath the very existence of its being, but not tonight. Tonight he will taste the blood that was promised; handed to him. His razor fangs will beg him no more for what they so rightly crave. Thus, the shadow silently wept, for the beast would not. Not when a meal so willingly served itself to him.

She was beautiful, the shadow remembered with a single tear. A vision of perfection at its finest. Aphrodite her self would have been cast back to the sea from which she came with one wondrous glance from this being's crystal ice orbs. They left the mist to shudder, as her milky white skin was complimented by the rays of light that turned such innocents into blood thirsty creatures. Her hair was a caramel, blonde and would have hung straight to her shoulders if it was not still damp from the child's bath mere hours ago.

The beast's large yellow eyes gave the beauty all the attention she deserved. It cocked its head to the left, as a low growl rumbbled in its throat.

"Why is it they lock you in here?" The beauty whispered, the rays continued to wash over her face, dancing across the pale skin as if it were using the same rhythmic pulse that manipulated the tides to toss grand steel vessels to the depths of the ocean's bottom. "I don't understand. They say I should not be down here. Should not be close to you, even though I want to be." The words flowed from the seven year old's lips, just as the other had taught. "Daddy said I should go to bed. Mommy cried out in pain that the night will soon be over, but they don't understand. I can't sleep with out you there, it's too quite." She paused, the icicles surveyed the thick iron bars between them. "Why must they put you here? It seems every day, but merely only once a month. I ask them, and they stare at the floor, as if it will come to life and answer all my questions for them. They won't look me in the eyes, and tell me why. Can you tell me?"

The beast whimpered, inching toward the gate. It inhaled the child's need to be near; how it needed to be near her.

The beauty saw him move. She slide closer to the gate herself, examining the complicanted padlock. "Do you want out, brother?" The child asked, the icy orbs frozen onto him.

The shadow clung to the corner in silence. Exhaustion teased his body, leaving his rigid muscles screaming out for relief. He closed his heavey lids, hoping that he did not have to witness that lovely flower wilting at his feet once again, but the action offered no condolence in blocking away the scene that scared his memories. The power pulsed through the air, as she reached for the locks; the magic she possessed claimed them. Noiselessly the iron gate swung open, and hollow eyes held ice without an ounce of difficulty.

_Noooooooo!_ The shadow cried, dropping to his knees in a heap of tears and sweat. His fingers dug into the stone floor, leaving trails of blood as it oozed from the tips. Her screams blended with his own howling voice in a harmonious melody. And as the morbid notes subside from the night air, it was replaced with the child's name. The warped shrill of a frantic woman vibrated off the stone cellar walls, and then settled itself into the conscious of the vile being. "Lillian!"

Both beast and shadow became one. A pair of glowing yellow eyes lifted to meet the new comer. His muzzle pulled back into a fierce snarl of utter joy; the purified blood of his victim dripping off his pearly whites. His night was far from over...

OoOoOo

Remus clung to his pillow; finger nails threating to rip it to shreds. His body from waist down was tangled within his sheets. The fabric of his pajama shirt grabbed at the pool of sweat that collected on his lower back.

This would have been a twisted scene, grey eyes concluded, if not for that single ray of sunlight peering through the crack between the closed curtains. The beam washed over the sleeping boy's face, highlighting his golden locks that hugged his forehead. A twisted scene indeed, grinned the grey, as he towered over his restless wolf. "Moony?"

The wolf stirred; barring those fangs of his in a dangerous sneer at the defenseless pillow.

The dark haired boy hesitated, not sure how to interpret the unconscious reply, but then threw any caution aside. "Remus?" He tried, shaking the wolf's shoulder lightly.

The wolf grunted as his eyes shot up with a start. "Wha..." He stuttered, his vision coming into focus. "What happened?"

"I think you were dreaming, Remus."

Remus craned his neck to find the source of the answer. "Oh." He managed as he stared into the gray eyes that captured the morning light so well. "Morning, Sirius. What time is it?"

"Almost seven twenty." Sirius offered, pushing some damp strings of black silk away from his face.

"Hmm," Remus thought. "wait! You're going to be late for class. You'll never make it to the North Tower standing here."

"Well, I wouldn't have to run there if I was twice as smart as you, and dropped the class, Mr. I-don't-have-to-be-out-of-bed-until-ten."

Remus laughed in his throat, causing the muscles to move and increasing the discomfort on his neck with the postion he held. Remus remedied the problem by laying flat onto his back. He relaxed a bit, the after affects of his dream wearing off.

"You okay, Remus?" Sirius asked his room mate.

"Yeah." He responsed, wiping the sleep out of his right eye. "I'm fine."

"Was it that bad?" Sirius leaned closer to the bed.

Remus blinked a couple of times. Sirius must know him better than he thought he did. "To tell the truth. I don't even remember the dream."

"All right." The answered seemed to satisfy Sirius. "Well, I must be going. Prongs and Wormtail are waiting for me down stairs." Remus nodded, as he proped him self on his elbow. "You should get a little more sleep, just to catch up and all."

The wolf smiled as Sirius turned to leave the dormitory. "Padfoot?" Remus spat out at the last second.

"Yes, Moony?"

The nerve in his right cheek twitched slightly, as those grey orbs gave up all their attention to him. "Um...Try not to fall asleep during class." Came out in one breath.

Sirius gave his most innocent smile. "Now, why would I do that?"

Remus shook his head. "Get out of here." And missed the retreating boy with his pillow.

OoOoOoOo

Professor Jingles was one of the most interesting poeple at Hogwarts. He had been to may places not even discovered by the large varity of population, but Remus just couldn't seem to fall under the teacher's mesmerizing tale of the old Cairo, and its affects on the one we know today. The werewolf's conversation with Sirius earlier kept nagging his brain, and the emtional residue that his dream caused decided to make an appearance on top of that.

"Today, Greater Cairo encompasses various historic towns and modern districts into one of the most populous cities in the world. A journey through Cairo is a virtual time travel: from..." Jingles' informed the class.

Time travel. The phrase stuck in Remus' mind as his quill scratched along with the rest. What he would give to be able to time travel. Of course there are terrible fates for those who mettle with time, but if he was just giving a chance he might...

"As you all know, Cairo, is the Capital of Egypt. And indeed its history is intertwined with that of the country. Could some one please tell me what Cairo's official name is? Mr. Lupin?"

Remus looked up from his notes. "Al-Qahira," He said, clearing his throat. "although the name informally used by most Egyptians is "Masr". Which is the Egyptian Arabic name for Egypt."

"Very good, Mr. Lupin. Ten points to Gryffindor." Professor Jinlges smiled and continued with his lesson; leaving Remus to muse over his clouded thoughts.

OoOoOoOo

All right, Remus began as the bell chimed to signal the end of Runes, if Sirius truly meant what he said the other night...does that mean...he 'loves' me? Remus shook his head; stuffing his supplies into his bag. No, that didn't make sense, his mind reasoned. Remus had no clue what 'love' was, he's only fourteen after all, and that just proved that Sirius was just as lost as he was on the noun. That would make sense...right? But what makes sense any more? Absolutely nothing at this point in time. But one thing was sure, there was some thing on Remus' mind when he stopped Sirius from leaving this morning. And that idea sent a shiver up his spine, as he headed to the Great Hall for lunch.

There was no denying it! And he had no intention on doing so. He wanted Sirius as much as the dark haired boy said he wanted him.

That was it. So simple. And he could freely snog the hell out of Sirius when ever he fancied; how he faniced it too.

Then why do you get this nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach when you see him? His mind asked, his dark blue eyes coming to rest on his room mate.

Horror filled images flashed like a white light across his inner eye. Why am I have these...nightmares again? Why...

"Moony!" James waved over to him, slapping him out of his thoughts. "There isn't going to be any more lunch left, if you don't hurry up!"

The werewolf smiled, shrugged his mental burden away for one more day, and joined his friends at the Gryffindor table.

"Oi, Moony!" Sirius laughed, flinging his arm over his friend's shoulder. "Think I could look over your Charms essay?"

_Here yah go! If there's something wrong, don't hesitant to say anything. I take all forms of criticism, just be tactful 'bout it. Thanx. Hope yah all like it!_


	13. Awaken

_Disclaimer: Still not mine, J K's XD_

Chapter Thirteen

"All right, wait approximately four minutes as the potion turns from a blood red to a pale purple, then stir three times counterclockwise before adding the stone crystalites." Lily read from her 5th addition of _Potions made easy_.

"Right." Remus nodded, staring intently inside his cauldron.

The common room had cleared out a bit since the two set aside their essays to began the Awaken potion for Slughorn's class. Two third years were huddled a few feet away mumbling about Goblin rebellions, a second year was staring intently at her Charms textbook, but would chance a glance toward Lily and Remus whenever she thought they weren't paying attention, and a group of five seven years sat near the burning glow of the fire trying and partly failing to grasp the concept of wandless magic. Remus grinned at their attempts. His mother had giving him a book over the summer with just that topic imprinted in its pages. The idea fascinated him, but who wouldn't be fascinated by such a feat? And as he imaged himself with such an ability Lily cleared her throat, bring him back to the present, "Tell me, Remus. What is the purpose of the stone crystalites?" She asked, much like any teacher would their pupil.

Remus couldn't help but laugh. "They give a stable base for the potion. Were as the Drought of Peace lacks the stability as to how long the sleep will endure, the stone crystalites in the Awaken clearly reflects the amount of time the drinker will have before the potion begins to fade or take affect on the sleeper's mind."

"Good." The red head smiled. "You can add them now, your potion is purple." Nodding as she spoken, Remus produced the bag of the crystalites, grabbed a small handful of the tiny stones, and threw them into the cauldron just as Lily screamed. "Two stones, Lupin!"

A cloud of horrible green smoke erupted from the black pot like a volcano. The pillow of thick moss engulfed the two Gryffindors and all else that shared the room.

Choking on the rot flavored vapor, Remus burst through the stain glass window of the common room along with a disgruntled Lily Evans. "Two stones!" She huffed.

"Sorry." Remus choked out with a stream of green smoke. "I'm so sorry." The werewolf's eyes watered as he tried to suck in as much fresh air as he could.

The windows to the left and right of the pair flew open as Remus focused on Lily's face, he wondered if the whites of his eyes were also a light yellow green in color. "I think we should work on potions out side from now on." She commented, a couple of choked _yes's_ answered her, causing them all to laugh.

OoOoOoOoOo

"Come on, guys!" Remus whined, as he flopped backwards onto the blazing red Gryffindor cough. "You can't tell me you are tired already. It's only midnight!"

"Listen, Moony, I don't know what has gotten into you," James yawned as he removed his glass and proceeded to massage his eye sockets with the palms on his hands. "but tomorrow is Wednesday and, as much I hate to say this, we all have Transfiguration and double Potions in the morning. Plus, I need my beauty sleep."

"And badly, from what I can tell." Sirius laughed, as he muffled a yawn with his fist.

"Remind me to smack you later for that, Padfoot." Came James' drowsy voice as he poked an unconscious Wormtail in the ribs. "Let's go, Wormy."

"But I don't want to go on the Merry-Go-Round." Peter answered in slurred speech.

"But little Mary Hopkins wants you to sit by her; she so loves those horses." Sirius prompted.

"W-well... I-if M-mary..." Stuttered Peter with closed eyes as he got to his feet and linked arms with James.

Sirius snickered as he dropped down beside Remus on the couch; a little light headed.

"That was cruel and unusual." The werewolf laughed next to the raven haired boy. "Cruel and unusual. So, what now? You're not going to retire are you?"

"I'm here, am I not?" Sirius grinned, shifting his position so his feet dangled over the end of the sofa at his knees and his head rested on Remus' right leg.

"So you are." The werewolf agreed, absentmindedly massaging the boy's head of silk black hair. The lump on Remus' leg soon revealed what the wolf was doing, by purring contently in its throat. "I thought only cats purr, Mr. Padfoot." Remus grinned; his fingers acting on their own accord.

"That was before I met you, Mr. Moony." Sirius sighed and rolled onto his left side.

If it had been any other night, Remus would have been self-conscious being this close to Sirius, but with a tampered with Awaken potion coursing through his system neither his own or the other's actions fazed him. He was actually getting annoyed that the mischief maker expert was falling asleep instead of causing unlawful mayhem! And then it him. Mayhem! The glow in Remus' eyes brightened, as he sprung to his feet causing a comfortable Padfoot to fall to the ground with a thud. "I know what we can do!" The werewolf announced. "Come on!" He grabbed Sirius' wrist, and was out the portrait door before the other could moan and complain about the unwelcome disturbance.

OoOoOoOo

"That was brilliant!" Sirius exclaimed, as they burst through the dormitory's door three hours later. "When will it happen?"

"Tomorrow at lunch." Remus replied. He had hoped the excess use of magic would have drained some of the potions affects away, but it hadn't. He faked a yawn while he followed Sirius into the room.

"I can't wait to see the looks on everyone's faces." Yawned Sirius.

"Yeah." The werewolf agreed, plopping down onto the bed in front of him. He stared at the canopy above his head wishing for sleep to come. Remus saw out of the corner of his eye Sirius open his mouth to say something, but closed it back up again. Instead he dropped down next to him on the mattress.

"So, Moony. What happened today?" Sirius asked, the tone of his voice made it seem he already knew.

"My potion exploded in my face down in the common room. I was coughing out green smoke for a good hour." He laughed.

"And?"

"And what?"

"And what about this morning?" Sirius moved to his side, facing his wolf.

"What about this morning?" Remus' eyes never left the red fabric draped over the bed frame.

"You were going to say something this morning, and it had nothing to do with sleeping in class." Sirius accused. "What was it?"

Silence fell between the two.

"I know it doesn't really seem like it, but I hope you realize that I'm here for you." Sirius paused. "If you want to tell me anything. I'm here."

Remus didn't want to admit to Sirius Black that he could be falling madly in love with him... The thought still didn't settle to well in his stomach. Maybe madly in love, wasn't the right phrasing? Or maybe his stomach was telling the truth and these feelings weren't meant to be? Whatever the excuse, Remus never got the chance to express it.

"Remus?" Sirius stared into the still slightly yellow ringed pupils of his friend. "Are you- Sleeping?" He poked Remus' ribcage, but no reaction came. Sirius shrugged and pulled the blankets up his chin. "Night, Remus."

_Well, here's 13...bit of a let down isn't it? but at least it's better than nothing, ay? anyhow...14 sooner or later. Workin on those 3 new stories, pretty excited bout them! thanx :D_


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